Small Dilemma

Something Jason and I are "struggling" with...acquaintances of ours provide their teenager with alcohol--they allow this person to drink in front of them and others, including other children. We are of the mind that it is just wrong to set that kind of example for your children. It is a parent's job to teach and provide consequences for breaking rules or laws.
I'm sure some of you think we're prudes--we're not. But a law is a law. The drinking age in this country, whether we agree or not, is 21. For a parent or any adult to give alcohol to a minor is very simply breaking the law. How do you then teach your child what is right and wrong?
If they rape someone, is that ok? If they drink and drive, is that ok? If they shoplift, is that ok?Those are all against the law as well, but I am almost positive those actions would not be condoned by these same parents. By allowing them to knowingly break the law, they are blurring the line between right and wrong. How then can you expect them to follow other, more serious laws?
My hope is that when, out of control in a drunken state, this teenager kills only himself and nobody who actually adds value to the world.

Captain, my captain!

Mimi and George have a new friend...his name is "Captain" and I think he's a pirate. They came to the kitchen yesterday, holding hands, and stated (rather boldly), that "We need eye patches and a ship."
OK. Let me get right on that. NANA!!!! We need you here NOW!!!!!!!!!!! I think ships and eye patches fall into Nana territory!
Captain rides in the back of the car with them and they fake feed him real food. Hmmm...
Sometimes Captain is sick and has to stay in bed. Sometimes he is naughty and they put him in the corner. Oh my.

Two Words:

Universal Healthcare.
I know it's very un-American, and I know doctors hate it, since it caps off their bloated salaries. But, it is the best solution to a country where people actually go bankrupt due to healthcare issues.
Take us...we are middle class, no doubt. We have a medically challenged child who needs frequent MRIs, heart catheters, etc. In Japan, George's MRI would cost 98USD. Here, it costs around 1200USD. In Japan, the doctor ordering/reviewing it does not drive a BMW and live in a mansion. Not the case here. Do you see my point?
Yes, I know doctors have many years of education. Yes, they save lives. My cousin is a firefighter. He literally saves lives, and in doing so, is constantly risking his own life. Does he drive a fancy car? No.
Of the following countries: Australia, Canada, France, Germany, Japan, Sweden, and the UK, the United States has the lowest life expectancy and the highest infant mortality rate, and yet all those other countries have universal/national healthcare. Hmmm...
I guess I am a Socialist after all. But you know, it makes sense since I do believe that every human has the right to an education and the right to healthcare. I guess, after all, I am for the government having its hand in it.
We receive bills constantly regarding our doctor's visits. They all say "NON-NEGOTIABLE."
They (Blue Cross Blue Shield), refused payments of my OB-GYN visits, stating that it was a pre-existing condition. What?????
They refused care for Natan months ago because they said we were wrong about his birth date. What?????
The list goes on, and Jason is always on the phone with Human Resources, battling it out.
Out of Jason's salary each month comes $1100 for this wonderful care which sucks. Tomorrow, we will be paying $1000 for George and Natan to have doctor-ordered MRI scans. That's $100 less than what he pays each month. What?????
I'm not whining, just stating facts. Amercian, for-profit healthcare is crap.
Two words: Universal Healthcare.

Snake warning!!!

One of our neighbors, Cliff who is kind of a street guardian, sent us an email. It let us know that another neighbor's dog had been bitten by a 3-foot long COPPERHEAD snake! Also that two years ago, another neighbor's dog was bitten.

Great. I have learned (almost) to live with:


Fire ants
Cockroaches
Honeysuckle
Water moccasins (from my Milledgeville days)
Red clay
And now...I have to live with snakes!!!!!!!!!!


Jason says, "Well...a bite won't kill you, but it would just really hurt." Thanks.


Cliff said the kids are ok because they won't be aggressive with a snake like a dog would be. Remind me to post the video of them massacring a beetle--they have NO FEAR!!! Snake?? Look, Mommy--whassat??????

One more thing

At the doctor's office today, I saw a girl who looked to be between 14 and 16, pregnant, accompanied by her boyfriend and mother. I thought about all the times people have said to me(and believe me, it's more than you would think!):
"Oh--you're just like Angelina Jolie!"
Would it be alright if I said to that girl:
"Oh--you're just like Jamie-Lynn Spears..."
I didn't think so.

Venting...it's been awhile!

I know it shouldn't bother me, but it does. Tonight we ate at a local restaurant (and I mean LOCAL). This is how the conversation went:
Waitress: "Now, you can't tell me ALL these kids are yours!" (in front of Mimi and Natan)
Me: (I think I looked adequately stunned): "Yep. All three of them."
Waitress: "No! They aren't all YOURS!"
Me: "Yep. We adopted two and had one. They're all mine."
Waitress: "Well, that's what I thought--I wondered if you'd had them at different times, like with different daddies."
(Oh. My. God. You are heinous and should have your tongue removed.)
Me: "Nope...same husband. Three kids. They're all mine."
Waitress: "And what are you expecting?"
Me: "A boy."
Waitress: "You have the same curse as me...I got three boys."

So...she ruined my meal and I will NOT be going back there. I find it very difficult to digest a meal when I'm that pissed. And, just for the record, I do NOT think I am cursed with boys. I love our boys and our girl the same--mainly for their uniqueness.

And--for all you who THINK you know why Jason and I adopted--here's the real reason so you can get it right:

We met. We discussed kids. We discovered that we were both very pro-adoption. We waited seven years (on purpose). We decided that by the end of 2004, we would have a child (if you know me at all, I am very determined once I have a goal in sight!). We started having unsafe sex. We filed for adoption. We let the chips fall, as they say...we got pregnant four months later, at the same time as were working on our adoption home study. We never considered for one moment of postponing the adoption.
We did NOT adopt because we were an infertile couple. We did NOT adopt because we tried for more than a year to get pregnant. We adopted because--and I can't believe people still do not get this--there are children in the world who do not have homes. They do not have moms and dads. They are starving. They have AIDS. They are dying. They often turn to prostitution and/or drugs when they are too old to live in an orphanage.
What are we as humans if we cannot see past our own selfishness and realize that a child is yours no matter how it comes into your life. It doesn't have to look like you, or act like you, or share any genetic traits with you. It is yours. Trust me on this.

There are those right now who are celebrating the upcoming birth of Vincent, yet they barely gave Natan a passing glance when he came home. I can only assume these people value biological children over adopted ones. We do not. They are equal. So...yes, we are excited about Vincent, but we are already thinking ahead to our fifth and final kid--one who will be adopted. You see, we have actually planned out our family and know how we want it to be. There are no accidents. Ellen, George, Natan, and Vincent are our kids because they are who we chose.
So, when you see us out in public and something stupid comes to your mind...please keep it to yourself.

Today's pet peeve

People who, when I am out with the kids (this mostly happens at church, where the kids feel very secure and comfortable and don't always listen to mom and dad!), who say, "What on earth are you going to do with FOUR??"
Seriously? Do you think we haven't thought this through? Babies don't happen "by accident"--even though there are some who beg to differ...we actually want a large family. Yes, there are many hectic days, but I look at those living the "quiet life" and wonder, "how do you stand it?!" I just don't verbalize it to them!
With four kids, we'll just spend more time at home, and less time around people who don't get it!
Oh, and if we had unlimited funds, we'd go for a dozen--so there!!

TMI

I just received a weekly pregnancy email update which informed that "my baby's testicles are most likely descending from his abdomen to his scrotum."
Hmmm...I don't think I'll call my mother with that latest tidbit!!!!!

Nesting???

Something is definitely up...I have more energy than I've had in months! Today, just "because," I moved three dressers, one bed, and now have a dormitory of sorts upstairs! All three kiddos are now going to share a room. Natan started climbing out of his crib last week, so he gets a "big boy" bed now. Mimi was concerned that I was giving her ever so comfy bed to Nana until I told her she could have whatever sheets she wanted on her new bed. She of course chose Diego (refusing Dora repeatedly!).
I would have moved the old iron bed into the other room except the kids were hungry for lunch so I ran out of time!
They may not have the most decorated or put together rooms, as I have had to empty everything out of them for safety reasons (!), but they are three happy children together and that is all they really care about!
For all you parents who are able to have froufrou, coordinated rooms because your kids are nicely spaced out in age...your time will come...in one way or another!

...and counting!

Saw the doctor yesterday...Vincent's head is down and directly on my bladder, which provides all sorts of fun. She said everything is great, and if I want him a week early, they can induce me the second week of May...as long as I make it until after my choir concert on the 4th, I'm happy!
So, about six more weeks until we meet number four!

Kidisms 3

Mimi learned the real word for "tootie" today (don't ask how THAT came up!!!!!) It is called a "Bachina." She then said, "It's because I'm from China!" I just agreed and let it go!

George: After dinner, we saw that his toe was bleeding all over the kitchen floor, so we wet a cloth to wash it and stick a band aid on it. He does NOT like to have his cuts and scrapes washed, so he started saying, "No! No! Don't wash it! It's not bleeding...not bleeding! It's just ketchup!"

I treated myself to a pedicure last week and took Mimi so she could have her fingernails painted. When we were driving home, she said, "Mama...did you see all those Chinese girls in there? Are they adopted too?"

Natan: currently sings "Who et ud ogs out...ooh, ooh, ooh." (Who let the dogs out). He also likes to get on the phone with his Nana and after mumbling a few things, says, "Thank you, Bye-Bye!"

Oh, has anyone ever attended a memorial service for a dead robot?????? This may be a first! We'll keep you posted...

Answers!

Finally an answer to this chronic laryngitis issue. I saw an ENT doctor today and he told me I have a deviated septum, acid reflux (worse because I'm preggers), and vocal nodules. Yuck. He told me no more singing, so thank goodness my choir concert is only a few weeks away--I will make it at least through that! He has me going to a speech therapist a couple of times to correct some of the vocal problems contributing to the nodules.
So, it's nice to have an answer and one that is treatable in some form or another. No surgery or weird drugs--just flonase, zantac, and better treatment of my voice.
He tried to convince me the raspy voice is sexy--I, along with most others, disagree wholeheartedly!!!!

Happy Easter!

The true meaning of Easter: finding as many eggs as possible and eating more candy than should ever be allowable!

Here is us--5 & 3/4 Montagues! Natan seems pretty stoked about his catch of eggs! Mimi proved herself to be a very stealthy candy-wrapper-opener! George was basically George...dirty knees and all!

Conversations, Part One

When asked what Mimi's favorite part of yesterday was (we had lunch and an Easter Egg Hunt at church, and dinner at the Shedd's), she answered, "David." David Shedd, you're our current favorite!

George, when asked what his favorite part was, went on a vocal rampage about the creaky sounds (I think he meant the creek by the Shedd's house...) I have no idea what he was talking about, but he kept coming back to "I don't like the creaky sounds." No idea. But it lasted for a good fifteen minutes--just him talking.

Natan is imitating EVERYTHING the big kids do...some good, some bad! All of a sudden, he is speaking and we can understand him! Yea! Sentences, even!

George bonded with "Baby Vissent" today--grabbed my belly and talked away to Vincent...mainly I think he wants him out of there so he can proceed with showing the ways of the world as a boy!

I love our kids...

Is that wrong to admit? I think not. Yes, there are days...but on days like this one, when they listen and say the sweetest things, and give random hugs and kisses, it's all good! Watching Mimi giving up her Waffle Fries for Natan today was particularly nice...I don't even know if I would do that!!!!

We saw many water mountains on the way to "Mommy's Doctor" today--Jason met us and played with the three for a LONG time while I waited to spend three minutes with the doctor. Vincent's heartbeat was the strongest I've heard yet, and they said everything is great! I start now with the "every two week" appointments...

Poor Natan is right at that place where he knows what he wants but cannot communicate it (the joys of being just over 2!). He has not even been here a year and speaks little English--give the kid a break! Some people forget where he spent the first 15 months of his life--not an easy transition.

My ongoing pet peeve rears its ugly head every so often: People with only girls or only one child who just don't understand boys or multiple siblings. (Give my mom her due: she admits that we were pretty easy and that she would have jumped off a bridge if we had done most of the things my kids do--although she seems to have forgotten some of shenanigans between my sister and me!! She has by force embraced their wildness and does not judge.) And people who say their boys are gems and NEVER act out are so full of crap it should be oozing from their very pores. If I hear one more time, "MY kids NEVER did that..." I may just go toddler (the mommy version of going postal!). My attitude has and always will be, Take us as we are or leave us be... That includes our children. I'm doing the best that I can with no previous experience. Sometimes I'm great, other times, I suck! Jason and I see parenting and children as a work in progress--it never ends, and there is always room for improvement on both ends!

I am always amazed at how some folks dole out the parental advice--unsolicited. They themselves are not necessarily models of good parenting, but still, they feel compelled to raise eyebrows and pass silent (and often vocal) judgements. Go away. I would just shoot myself if our kids were bland or boring--they are neither of those things!!!!!!

So, to all of you who love us and our kids NO MATTER WHAT (and you know who you are!)...thank you. We love you too!!!!

Singin' in the Whatever/Wherever!

Natan can sing!!!! He sings "The Itsy Bitsy Spider" now with actions! So, he's one of those kids who sings before he talks. He also loves any kind of music and would sit at the piano all day if we let him. The other two on the other hand...

George does do a hot rendition of "Mary had a Little Lamb"...

My Mimi quote for the week shouldn't really be posted, but it has something to do with puberty and how observant she is. Sufficed to say, she is pretty aware of how, ahem...different we all look!!!

Kid-isms...Part Deux

Looking at the newly budding pear trees on our street (Mimi):
"Look--snow trees!"

After cutting himself on the palm tree outside (George):
"That is a shark tree!" (he means sharp, but shark works just as well!)

At 6:00 this morning when Jason left for work (Mimi):
"I'm going to miss my Daddy..."

George had another dream about the giant head...it seems to be a recurring one! Sometimes he says it looks like Natan, and other times he says it looks like Little Bill!

Mimi: "How is Vincent going to come out?" (to my mother's chagrin, I gave her the truth!)
Me: "My tootie."
Mimi: (after a thoughtful moment): "That's going to be owie!"

Mimi and George are now trying to pull Vincent out via my belly button...a little painful but pretty hilarious!

Natan is talking more, but nothing quotable yet!! Just wait...his time is coming!

Mimi

(Driving in the "bus" on the way home from the car wash...)
Mimi: "Mama..."
Me: "Yes, Mimi?"
Mimi: "I'm hungry...I eating my boogers."
(a few minutes later)
Mimi: "Mama..."
Me: "Yes, Mimi?"
Mimi: "Are we going to have samiches?"
Me: "Yes, as soon as we get home. Why, are you still hungry?"
Mimi: "Yes, and my boogers don't taste very good."

Updating...

Clearly things are busy here and I have no time to get on the computer--a good and bad thing!
My current pet peeve:
1. People who, when asking where Mimi and Natan are from, then ask, "So George is yours?" I used to excuse this this as, "well, they don't really mean that," but now I just add them to my stupid people list, which continues to grow! So for anyone who is unclear on this (duh)...they are ALL MINE!!! Oh, and Jason's too!!! If you can't or won't accept adoption as a viable and wonderful way to grow a family, then there is a phrase just for you which I will not write on my blog. Use your imagination...
Oh, and one more thing...when you refer to Asian people or Black people in a derogatory manner, you DO include two of our children. They are Asian and Black, and racism is racism no matter who you intend it for. So...just shut your trap--it makes my life so much easier!

Some kid-isms:

Mimi: "I am Little Mommy..."
"Mama--watch me!" "Mama...watch this!" "Mama...look what I can do!" (Say this out loud fifty times or so times per hour, and you'll get the idea!

George: "But I want to be great..." (when he is being naughty and in time-out)

Both Mimi and George call out "Water Mountains" which are actually water towers when they're in the car.

George has announced that he would like to be a giant when he grows up...somedays he gets fancy and says a giant robot...

Natan's new favorite saying: "Oh, man!"

WMD

Alert the President. I have found what he has been searching for in vain...Weapons of Mass Destruction. They've been here the whole time. They are destructing as we speak.